He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
- Isaiah 40:29-31

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

One Day

One day, they tell me, that I will look back at this time and laugh. One day, they tell me, to take at a time. One day, they say, I will miss these days.

Today is not the one day. Today, I wonder if I'll ever make it to that one day so that I can look back and laugh. Today, I think that one day seems so, so far away.

So, what makes me say all of this? Well, as usual a lot has been going on with the Czorapinski's. First, Noah only spent one day in his new school. Apparently, after reading his educational testing report and listening to all of our concerns, they felt that Noah would do fine. We on the other hand were never informed that he would have to write in cursive. Yes, cursive. In kindergarten. No print. Only cursive. Great. So looking like idiots, we unenrolled him and re enrolled him back in the public school. We asked for a new teacher and it looked as though things were going in the right direction. That is until one day (two days ago) his new teacher calls to tell me that Noah has told a child in the class he would "burn down their house." But, this was after he made another child cry and told her "he would beat up her dad." Parenting. It sucks. So, after taking away some privileges, making Noah write apology notes and talking to him about hurting others, I sent him to school yesterday and prayed for the best. His teacher calls in the afternoon to say that he called another child "the dumbest" and called the same little girl as before, fat. I have no idea where he is hearing this stuff or coming up with it. He just isn't my sweet little Noah. And if one day I'm going to look back on these days and smile, I can't imagine what must be ahead of me! Of course, after talking some more and taking away a few more things that are really important to Noah, he had a great day yesterday and promises me that it won't happen again. We'll see about that.

As for Joshua, he has RSV and therefore we ended up in the Hopkins ER last week. He was able to be discharged but after being up all night, we were all exhausted. His check up on Tuesday reveled that he has a small whole in his ear. Seems that his ears needed to drain themselves and this can sometimes happen. It will heal and not cause any damage but no wonder the child was screaming with his ears last week.

Adam is doing well. I feel like I don't write a lot about Adam but to be honest, he's our most "normal" child. He is developing a love of soccer and is always kicking the ball around the house. He's actually pretty good and I'm sure his Uncle Nick will love that he enjoys soccer so much.

Jeff and I are surviving. We have been stressed beyond what we ever thought we could handle and yet we are still functioning. We are looking forward to spring and summer and what they will bring. We are planning a family trip to Nags Head and preparing for the twins to turn 5. I can't believe my babies will be starting kindergarten in the fall. That's the "one day" that has really snuck up on me for sure. But, we are mostly preparing for August 11th. Because that's the day. The one day. The day that Joshua WILL receive his last and final dose of chemotherapy. I know we said it before and then there was that whole relapse thing but this time this is it. August 11th. Mark your calendars. That's the day. The one day that I have been waiting for since April 17, 2006 when this whole nightmare began. It is the one day that we will forget all the minor things that are happening in our lives, the years of chemo, the fears, the struggles, the pain. It is the one day that we will start over. It is the one day that will make me forget all the days like today. Okay so maybe not forget them, but at least make look back and say "yeah, but that was just one day......"